Reading: The Host
by ffrackles
Summary: Full summary inside. Moved from my old account. R&R :)
1. Prologue

**Disclaimer**; I do not know any of the words that belong to Stephenie Meyer, or any of these characters. I just decided to twist things up a little. I hope you'll enjoy this story.

**- Prouloge -**

Jared, Ian and Kyle was sitting in the empty kitchen discussing their latest raid, when suddenly Jeb appeared.

"You three – hospital, now," was all that he said, and then disappeared again as quickly as he had appeared.

The three of them shared a look, clearly asking what the hell this was all about, but then got up and followed Jeb down to the hospital wing.

There they found Jeb and Doc, discussing something in whispered voices.

Jeb held something in his hand, a dark mass, but none of the three could figure out what it was.

"Sit," Jeb ordered, and everyone took a place around Doc's desk, dragging cots there to sit on.

"What is this about?" Ian asked, and Jeb shot a quick glance at Doc.

"I found something when you where on the raid, and we should look at it together."

"What is it?"

"A book."

"A book? What, you want us to _read?"_ Kyle asked in disbelief, and Jeb nodded slowly with a serious expression on his face.

"You've got to be kidding me, I have better things to do then read all day," Jared said, and begun to rise, but Jeb stopped him.

"Jared, you of all people should want to read this."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

Jeb shot another look at Doc.

"I choose Ian and Kyle because I have a feeling that tells me they should be here. Doc is here for the very same reason. And you Jared, you might have a bigger part of this than any of the rest."

"I have no idea what you're talking about, Jeb."

"I know. Jared, mind reading the back for us?" Jeb said, and gave the book to Jared, who took it reluctantly as he let out a sigh. Reading the back was the least he could do. Maybe then he'd know what the hell this was about. Or at least give him a better argument for why he didn't need to be reading all day long.

He shot a quick glance at the book, and then he froze in place.

"No, impossible," he said, shaking his head. "This can't be."

"Jared, you see? You should be here," Jeb said.

"What?" Ian asked, and Jeb took the book from Jared and gave it to Ian.

"Read," was all he said.

**Melanie Stryder,**

"Wait, Stryder? Isn't that your last name, Jeb?" Ian said, right after he read the word.

"And Jamie's," Kyle said, looking at his brother. Together they looked at Jared.

"Read," Jeb ordered again, without giving a single hint of what the book might be about. After all, he didn't really know himself. Not much more than what was on the back of the book. And it wasn't even close to what he wanted to know.

**Melanie Stryder refuses to fade away. The Earth had been invaded by a species that takes over the minds of their human hosts, and most of humanity had succumed.**

**Wanderer, the invading "soul" who has been given Melanie's body, was warned about the challenges of living inside a human: the overwhelming emotions, the too vivid memories. But****she did not expect that Melanie would refuse to relinquish possession of her mind.**

**Melanie fills Wanderer's thoughts with visions of the man Melanie loves—Jared, a human who still lives in hiding. Unable to separate herself from her body's desires, Wanderer begins to yearn for a man she's never met. As outside forces make Wanderer and Melanie unwilling allies, they set off to search for the man they both love.**

"A real love triangle," Kyle joked, seeming to be unable to see the importance in the words his brother had just read.

"Are you stupid? This is about us!" Ian said to his older brother, serious.

"It's just a joke, man."

"And you're more stupid than I thought you were."

"Calm down, we're not going to argue about this," Doc said, and the brothers fell into silence. _Much_, Doc silently added in his mind. This could cause some drama, the doctor knew that very well and worriedly looked at Jared.

"As you can see, this seems to be about us. Well, at least Jared. So I think we should put in a vote, but if I'm not pleased with the end of this discussion, I'm deciding anyway."

"Then let's just read it, you're deciding anyway, and I think we all want to read it," Ian said to Jeb. "If this thing is real, if this really is about us, then we owe it to ourselves."

"Okay then, and no fighting," Jeb looked at Kyle when he said the last thing, and Kyle grinned. Ian looked like he wanted to hit his brother. Again.

Jeb took the book from Ian's hands, taking it to himself to read the first chapter. No one argued, knowing Jeb always got his way.

"**Prologue – Inserted,"**Jeb started in a steady voice.

"I wonder…" Doc's voice trailed off when Jeb continued to read, ignoring the words he heard around him.

**The Healer's name was Fords Deep Waters.**

"Ha," Kyle scoffed, crossing his arms over his chest.

**Because he was a soul, by nature he was all things good: compassionate, patient, honest, virtuous, and full of love. Anxiety was an unusual emotion for Fords Deep Water.**

**Irritation was even rarer. However, because Fords Deep Water lived inside a human body, irritation was sometimes inescapable.**

"He seems like a nice guy," Kyle said sarcastically, but Jeb continued reading like he hadn't heard a single word, with his poker face on.

**As the whispers of the Healing students buzzed in the far corner of the operation room, his lips pressed together into a tight line.**

**The expression felt out of place on a mouth more often given to smiling.**

**Darren, his regular assistant, saw the grimace and patted his shoulder.**

"**They're just curious, Fords," he said quietly.**

"**An insertion is hardly an interesting or challenging procedure."**

"Maybe not for you, but for me it is," Doc said quietly, and everyone knew that he wished to know how to do one.

"**Any soul on the street could perform it in an emergency. There is nothing for them to learn by observing today." Fords was surprised to hear the sharp edge marring his normally soothing voice.**

"**They've never seen a grown human before," Darren said.**

Jared stiffened at this, as did Jeb a little bit. They both knew this wasn't just any human.

**Fords raised one eyebrow. "Are they blind to each other's faces? Do they not have mirrors?"**

"**You know what I mean – a wild human. Still soulless. One of the insurgents."**

**Fords looked at the girl's unconscious body, laid out facedown on the operating table.**

**Pity swelled in his heart as he remembered the condition the poor, broken body had been in when the Seekers had brought her to the Heeling facility. Such pain she'd endured…**

Jared grimaced, his body becoming more rigid. He didn't like that Mel had been in pain, maybe more then he didn't like that she had been taken in the first place. He had accepted that she was gone, not truly knowing if she was gone, or… taken. But now he knew. And he didn't like it.

Jeb's voice was harsher when he read again.

**Of course she was perfect now – completely healed.**

Jared relaxed a little bit at that. But not much.

**Fords had seen to that.**

"**She looks the same as any of us," Fords murmured to Darren. "We all have human faces. And when she wakes up, she will be one of us, too."**

"**It's just exiting for them, that's all."**

"**The soul we implant today deserves more respect then to have her host body gawked at this way. She'll already have far too much to deal with as she acclimates."**

"What does he mean with that?" Ian wondered, just as much as everyone else did.

"I guess we'll see," Jeb said, and then begun to read again.

"**It's not fair to put her through this." By****_this,_****he did not mean the gawking.**

**Fords heard the sharp edge return to his voice.**

**Darren patted him again. "It will be fine. The Seekers needs information and-"**

Everyone but Jeb shuddered at the word Seeker.

**At the word****_Seeker_****, Fords gave Darren a look that could only be described as a glare.**

**Darren blinked in shock.**

"**I'm sorry," Fords apologized at once. "I didn't mean to react so negatively. It's just that I fear for this soul."**

**His eyes moved to the cryotank on its stand beside the table. The light was a steady, dull read, indicating that it was occupied and in hibernation mode.**

"**This soul was specially picked for the assignment," Darren said soothingly.**

"**She is exceptional among our kind – braver than most. Her lives speak for themselves. I think she would volunteer, if it was possible to ask her."**

"**Who among us would not volunteer if we were asked to do something for the greater good? But is that really the case here? Is the greater good served by this?"**

"No, it's not," Jared answered the question, and the rest seemed to agree with him with a single nod of their heads**.**

"**The question is not her willingness, but what it is right to ask any soul to bear."**

**The Healing students were discussing the hibernating soul as well. Fords could hear the whispers clearly: their voices was rising now, getting louder with their excitement.**

"**She's lived on six planets."**

"**I heard seven."**

"**I heard she never lived two terms as the same host species."**

"**Is that possible?"**

"**She's been almost everything. A Flower, a Bear, a Spider-"**

"**A See Weed, a Bat-"**

"**Even a Dragon!"**

"**I don't believe it – not seven planets."**

"**At least seven. She started at the Orgin."**

"**Really? The Orgin?"**

"Why does that one seemed surprised by that?" Ian mumbled, expecting no one to answer his question.

"**Quiet, please!" Fords interrupted. "If you cannot observe professionally and silently, then I will have to ask you to remove yourselves."**

**Abashed, the six students fell silent and edged away from another.**

"**Let's go on with this, Darren."**

**Everything was prepared. The appropriate medicines were laid our beside**

**The human girl. Her long dark hair was secured beneath a surgical cap, exposing her slender neck. Deeply sedated, she breathed slowly in and out. Her sun-browned skin had barely a mark to show for her… accident.**

"What does that mean? Why did he hesitate at the word accident?" Jared asked worried, knowing that no one around the table could answer the question.

Jeb read without saying anything.

"**Begin thaw sequence now, please, Darren."**

**The gray-haired assistant was already waiting beside the cryotank, his hand resting on the dial. He flipped the safety back and spun down the dial. The red light atop the small gray cylinder began to pulse, flashing faster as the seconds passed, changing color.**

**Fords concentrated on the unconscious body: he edged the scalpel through the skin at the base of the subject's skull with small, precise movements, and then sprayed the medication that stilled the excess flow of blood before he widened the fissure. Fords delved delicately beneath the neck muscles, careful not to injure them, exposing the pale bones at the top of the spinal column.**

"**The soul is ready, Fords," Darren informed him.**

"**So am I. Bring her."**

**Fords felt Darren at his elbow and knew without looking that his assistant would be prepared, his hand stretched out and waiting; they had worked together for many years now. Fords held the gap open.**

"**Send her home," he whispered.**

No one said anything, but they all thought the same thing.

Earth was _not_ the home of the souls. It was the home of the humans, _their_ home. They just didn't know how to get it back.

**Darren's hand moved into view, the silver gleam of an awaking soul in his palm.**

**Fords never saw an exposed soul without being struck by the beauty of it.**

"What part of a parasite is beautiful?" Kyle scoffed.

"Can't be much," his brother answered him.

**The soul shone in the brilliant lights of the operating room, brighter than the reflective silver instrument in his hand. Like a living ribbon, she twisted and rippled, stretching, happy to be free of the cryotank. Her thin, feathery attachments, nearly a thousand of them, billowed softly like pale silver hair. Though they were all lovely, this one seemed particularly graceful to Fords Deep Waters.**

**He was not alone in his reaction. He heard Darren's soft sigh, heard the admiring murmurs of the students.**

**Gently, Darren placed the small glistening creature inside the opening Fords had made in the human's neck. The soul slid smoothly into the offered space, weaving herself into the alien anatomy.**

"Alien, yeah right," Kyle scoffed again.

"We are alien to them, just like they are to us," Doc said soothingly.

"That doesn't make us invade their planets, right?" Kyle raised his voice to Doc.

"No, but we don't work the same way they do."

"If you actually start_liking_ this soul, I'm going to hit you."

"Kyle, shut yer trap," Jeb said, and Kyle fell silent. Doc didn't answer Kyle, wondering if he might start liking her or not. Knowing himself, he knew at least she couldn't hate her. Not in the long haul.

**Fords admired the skill with which she possessed her new home.**

**Her attachments wound tightly into place around the nerve centers, some elongating and reaching deeper to where he couldn't see, under and up into the brain, the optic nerves, the ear canals. She was very quick, very firm in her movements. Soon, only one small segment of her glistening body was visible.**

"It could have been more detailed…" Doc muttered to himself, but no one really listened to him as they were deep into the words of the book.

"**Well done," he whispered to her, knowing that she could not hear him. The human girl was the one with ears, and she slept soundly.**

**It was a routine matter to finish the job. He cleaned and healed the wound, applied the salve that sealed the incision closed behind the soul, and then brushed the scar-softening powder across the line left on her neck.**

Without seeming to realize he was doing it, Jared raised one of his hands to his neck, and stroked the pink scar he had there, thinking about that one time he put his knife to his neck, trying to make it look as pretty as all the rest. Of course he didn't succeed. But it was enough. He blended in at least a little bit better.

"**Perfect, as usual," said the assistant, who, for some reason unfathomable to Fords, had never made a change from his human host's name, Darren.**

**Fords sighed. "I regret this day's work."**

"You should," Jared said, who grieved Mel more than he would let anyone know.

"**You're only doing your duty as a Healer."**

"**This is the rare occasion when Healing creates an injury."**

**Darren began to clean up the workstation. He didn't seem to know how to answer.**

**Fords was filling his Calling. That was enough for Darren.**

**But not enough for Fords Deep Waters, who was a true Healer to the core of his being. He gazed anxiously at the human female's body, peaceful in slumber, knowing that this peace would be shattered as soon as she awoke. All the horror of this young girl's end would be borne by the innocent soul he'd just placed inside her.**

**As he leaned over the human and whispered in her ear, Fords wished fervently that the soul inside could hear him now.**

"**Good luck, little wanderer, good luck. How I wish you didn't need it."**

"That's the end of this chapter," Jeb said, and was about to give the book to Doc, when Jared snatched it out of his hands.

"Gimme that," he expressed. "It's my turn to read."


	2. Remembered

A/N: Oh, look, second chapter up already. At the moment I have five chapters, including this one and the last one, done and ready for publication. I hope to be able to go through some more today, but I can't promise anything. I don't have to work until wednesday, so I'll try to go through as many chapters as possible before that. In the mean time, enjoy what is done and published, and leave me some more of those lovely reviews, will you? :)

**- Remembered -**

**Remembered,** Jared read.

**I knew it would begin with the end, and the end would look like death to these eyes. I had been warned.**

**Not ****_these _****eyes. ****_My _****eyes. Mine. This was me now.**

Jared read with clenched teeth, and everyone seemed to wonder if he should be reading this. But no one said, or did, anything as they knew it had to be read and that Jared needed to hear it.

**The language I had found myself using was odd, but it made sense.**

**Choppy, boxy, blind, and linear. Impossibly crippled in comparison to many I'd used, yet still it managed to find fluidity and expression.**

**Sometimes beauty. My language now. My native tongue.**

**With the truest instinct of my kind, I'd bound myself securely into the body's center of thought, twined myself inescapably into its every breath and reflex until it was no longer a separate entity. It was me.**

**Not ****_the _****body, ****_my _****body.**

Jared's teeth clenched even more, and it was hard to hear the hard words coming out of his mouth.

**I felt the sedation wearing off and lucidity taking its place.**

**I braced myself for the onslaught of the first memory, which would really be the last memory – the last moments this body had experienced, the memory of the end.**

Jared's hands started to shake, and Ian reached over to take the book from him, which was an harder task than he thought it would be. But eventually Jared let go, and Ian continued reading after glancing at the man before him.

**I had been warned thoroughly of what would happen now. These human emotions would be stronger, more vital than****the feelings of any other species I had been. I tried to prepare myself.**

**The memory came. And, as I'd been warned, it was not something that could ever be prepared for.**

**It seared with sharp color and ringing sound. Cold on her skin, pain gripping her limbs, burning them. The taste was fiercely metallic in her mouth.**

Ian stopped reading and looked at Jared, who looked like he was fighting back tears, but it was hard to tell because none of them had ever seen Jared like this. He was always so… stable. Held his ground.

No one really knew how close Jared had been to Mel, but they could tell they were close, and everyone had their own guess. But to everyone it was very obvious that Jared loved this Melanie.

"I could just skip this part," Ian offered, but Jared shook his head.

"No, I need to know what happened to her."

**And there was the new sense, the fifth sense I'd never had, that took the particles from the air and transformed them into strange messages and pleasures and warnings in her brain – scents. They were distracting, confusing to me, but not to her memory. The memory had no time for the novelties of smell. The memory was only fear.**

**Fear locked her in a vise, goading the blunt, clumsy limbd forward but hampering them at the same time. To flee, to run – it was all she could do.**

**_I've failed._**

"No, you didn't," Jared whispered, as if Mel could her him.

**The memory that was not mine was so frighteningly strong and clear that it sliced through my control – overwhelmed the detachment, the knowledge that this was just a memory and not me.**

"Good, you deserve to suffer, this is your fault," Jared accused, blaming the soul for everything that had happened to Mel.

**Sucked into the hell that was the last minute of her life, I was she, and we were running.**

**It's so dark. I can't see. I can't see the floor. I can't see my hands streched out in front of me. I run blind and try to hear the pursuit I can feel behind me, but the pulse is so loud behind my ears it drowns everything else out.**

**It's cold. It shouldn't matter now, but it hurts. I'm so cold.**

Ian barely paused between the segments, leaving just enough time to each person around him to understand the last moments of Melanie's life kept shifting.

**The air in her nose was uncomfortable. Bad. A bad smell. For one second, that discomfort pulled me free of the memory. But it was only a second, and then I was dragged in again, and my eyes filled with horrified tears.**

**I'm lost, we're lost. It's over.**

**They're right behind me now, loud and close. There are so many footsteps! I am alone. I've failed.**

**Jared lowered his head, closing his eyes as he fought his tears back. He couldn't listen to this. Every fiber of his body wanted to get up and walk away. But he had to know what happened, he had been wondering for so long now.**

**The Seekers are calling. The sound of their voices twists my stomach. I'm going to be sick.**

"**It's fine, it's fine," one lies, trying to calm me, to slow me. Her voice is disturbed by the effort of her breathing.**

"**Be careful!" another shouts in warning.**

"**Don't hurt yourself," one of them pleads. A deep voice, full of concern. Concern!**

**Heat shot trough my veins, and a violent hatred nearly choked me.**

**I had never felt such an emotion as this in all my lives. For another second, my revulision pulled me away from the memory. A high, shrill keening pierced my ears and pulsed in my head. The sound scraped through my airways. There was a weak pain in my throat.**

**_Screaming, _****my body explained. ****_You're screaming._**

**I froze in shock, and the sound broke off abruptly.**

**This was not a memory.**

**My body – she was thinking! ****_Speaking _****to me!**

"What did you just read?" Jared asked, his head snapping up to look at Ian.

"I read exactly what you heard," he answered softly, just as confused as everyone else was.

"This must be some kind of sick joke. How can she...How… I…" Jared started, but lost his words along the way, not sure what to even think. How could this be? Was Melanie still there? His Mel, the woman who, in a very short amount of time, had become his everything despite him knowing better – was she still in there, aware? Was that good or bad?

"When is the book from?" Doc asked instead, and Ian looked after.

"It doesn't say."

"This hasn't happened. Can't have. I've only been here for a few months," Jared stated, but he sounded distant. His thoughts were still on Melanie.

**But the memory was stronger, in that moment, than my astonishment.**

"**Please," they cry. "There is danger ahead."**

**_The danger is behind! _****I scream back in my mind. But I see what they mean.**

**A feeble stream of light, coming from who knows where, shines on the end of the hall.**

**It is not the flat wall or the locked door, the dead end I feared and expected. It is a black hole. An elevator shaft. Abandoned, empty, and condemned, like this building.**

**Once a hiding place, now a tomb.**

"She's brave. Always has been," Jeb said, figuring out what would happen next.

"But she's not dying," Jared whispered, and the tears he was still fighting back were barely noticeable in his voice.

**A surge of relief floods through me as I raced forward. There is a way. No way to survive, but perhaps a way to win.**

**No, no, no! This thought was all mine, and I fought to pull myself away from her, but we were together. And we sprinted from the edge of death.**

Despite his best efforts, a single tear rolled down Jared's left check and he closed his eyes, pretending no one saw it. Pretending he was stronger than this. Willing it to be true. Heck, he could handle this. It was just a book, some words on a paper.

"**Please!" The shouts are more desperate.**

**I feel like laughing when I know that I am fast enough. I imagine their hands clutching for me just inches behind my back. But I am as fast as I need to be.**

"She's always been fast," Jared mumbled to himself.

**I don't even pause at the end of the floor. The hole rises up to meet me midstride.**

**The emptiness swallows me. My legs flail, useless. My hands grip the air, claw through it, searching for anything solid. Cold blows past me like tornado winds.**

**I hear the thud before I feel it... The air is gone...**

**And then pain is everywhere... Pain is everything.**

**Make it stop.**

**_Not high enough, _****I whisper to myself through the pain.**

**When will the pain end? When...?**

**The blackness swallowed up the agony, and I was weak with gratitude that the memory had come to this most final of conclusions. The blackness took all, and I was free.**

**I took a breath to steady myself, as was this body's habit. ****_My _****body.**

**But then the color rushed back, the memory reared up and engulfed me again.**

**_No! _****I panicked, fearing the cold and the pain and the very fear itself.**

**But this was not the same memory. This was a memory within a memory – a final memory, like a last gasp of air – yet, somehow, even stronger than the first.**

**The blackness took all but this: a face.**

"And in comes Jared," Kyle chuckled, but both Jared and Ian glared at him.

"Can you just shut up with your silly comments for once," Jared argued and Kyle shut up, his smile apparent on his face as his brother continued to read.

**The face was as alien to me as the faceless serpentine tentacles of my last host body would be to this new body. I'd seen this kind of face in the images I had been given to prepare for this world. It was hard to tell them apart, to see the tiny variations in color and shape that was the only markers of the individual. So much the same, all of them.**

**Noses centered in the middle of the sphere, eyes above and mouths below, ears around the sides. A collection of senses, all but touch, concentrated in one place. Skin over bones, hair growing on the crown and in strange furry lines above the eyes.**

"It's called eyebrows," Kyle chuckled, but Ian easily ignored his brother.

**Some had more fur lower down on the jaw: those were always males. The colors ranged through the brown scale from pale cream to a deep almost-black.**

**Aside from that, how to know one from the other?**

**This face I would of known among millions.**

**This face was a hard rectangle, the shape of the bones strong under the skin. In color it was light golden brown. The hair was just a few shades darker than the skin, except where flaxen streaks lightened it, and it covered only the head and the odd fur stripes above the eyes. The circular irises in the white eyeballs were darker than the hair but, like the hair, flecked with light. There were small lines around the eyes, and her memories told me the lines was from smiling and squinting into sunlight. I knew nothing of what passed for beauty among these strangers, and yet I knew that this face was beautiful. I wanted to keep looking at it.****As soon as I realized this, it disappeared.**

**_Mine, _****spoke the alien thought that should not have existed.**

"How is it possible that she is still there?" Jared asked, his voice just as broken as his heart. He didn't want Mel to be a captured, let alone to her own humanity.

"I don't know, but I guess we should have guessed it from what Ian read on the back," Jeb said, calmly. No emotions in his voice. He was good at that.

**Again, I was frozen, stunned. There should have been no one here but me.**

**And yet this thought was so strong and so aware!**

"That might have something to do with it," Jeb mumbled. "Mel has always been strong. Maybe that has something to do with the fact that she is still there?"

"Do you really think so, Jeb? I mean, is than even possible?" Jared asked him.

"I don't know any more than you do, Jared. I wish I did."

**Impossible. How was she still here? This was me now.**

**_Mine ,_****I rebuked her, the power and authority that belonged to me alone flowing through the word. ****_Everything is mine._**

**_So why am I talking back to her? _****I wondered as the voices interrupted my thoughts.**

"You're not alone to wonder," Doc said, and then waited for Ian to continue.

"That was it," Ian stated when everyone was looking at him, waiting for him to continue, and then he passed the book to Doc, who gladly took it.


	3. Overheard

A/N: You guys are amazing, and I'd just really like to say thank you to all of the reviews, and wish that you'll really like this chapter :)

**- Overheard -**

**Overheard,"**Doc read in a steady, calm voice.

**The voices was soft and close and, though I was only now aware of them, apparently in the middle of a murmured conversation.**

"**I'm afraid it's too much for her," one said. The voice was soft but deep, male.**

"I have a feeling that might be the Healer," Doc said, and Jeb seemed to agree with him as he gave a single, slow nod in Doc's direction.

"**Too much for anyone. Such violence!" The tone spoke of revulsion.**

"**She screamed only once," said a higher, reedy, female voice, poiting this out with a hint of glee, as if she were winning an argument.**

"**I know," he man admitted. "She is very strong. Others have had much more trauma, with much less cause."**

"**I'm sure she'll be fine, just as I told you."**

"**Maybe you missed your Calling." There was an edge to the male voice. Sarcasm, my memory named it. "Perhaps you were meant to be a Healer, like me."**

"I guess you were right," Ian commented. "About it being the Healer, I mean."

**The woman made a sound of amusement. Laughter. "I doubt that. We Seekers prefer a different sort of diagnosis."**

"I have a feeling I won't like this Seeker very much," Jeb addressed, his lips softly pursed.

"I'm not going to like any of these 'souls,'" Kyle spit out, venom in his voice and at the moment no one could really blame him.

**My body knew this word, this title:****_Seeker._**

**It sent a shudder of fear down my spine.**

"Why afraid of someone your own species?" Ian wondered.

"Maybe it's like us. There are good and bad in their world, too," Doc answered Ian with a question of his own.

"What part about a parasite can be good?" Kyle asked, back to using the word parasite.

**A leftover reaction. Of course,****_I_****had no reason to fear Seekers.**

"But yet you do," Doc mumbled. "I wonder why..."

"**I sometimes wonder if the infection of humanity touches those in your profession," the man mused, his voice still sour with annoyance.**

"**Violence is part of your life choice. Does enough of your body's native temperament linger to give you enjoyment of the horror?"**

**I was surprised at his accusation, at his tone. This discussion was almost like... an argument. Something my host was familiar with but that I'd never experienced.**

**The woman was defensive. "We do not choose violence. We face it when we must. And it's a good thing for the rest of you that some of us are strong enough for the unpleasantness. Your peace would be shattered without our work."**

"That's a new way of seeing things," Jeb muttered, and it was obvious that he didn't like the Seeker very much, as he had earlier commented.

"**Once upon a time. Your vocation will soon be obsolete, I think."**

"**The error of that statement lies on the bed there!"**

"**One human girl, alone and unarmed! Yes, quite a threat to our peace."**

**The woman breathed out heavily. A sigh. "But where did she come from? How did she appear in the middle of Chicago, a city long since civilized, hundreds of miles from any trace of rebel activity? Did she manage it alone?"**

"So that's what they call us, rebel activity," Kyle let out something that could only be described as a mix of a chuckle and a snort.

Jared changed the subject, ignoring Kyle's words.

"She managed to get all the way to Chicago. Why did I let her go all by herself?" his voice was sad, he was holding a grudge on himself.

"What exactly was she doing in Chicago, anyway?" Ian asked what was clearly on everyone's mind. Jared and Jeb knew the answer of course. But the others didn't.

Jared hadn't said much when he found the caves, and it was only Jeb who really knew Jared and Mel had been in love. But the rest was close to figuring that much out.

"She was looking for Sharon," was all Jared answered to his question, and it was clear that he wasn't going to say anything else so Doc continued to read after a short break.

**She listed the questions without seeming to seek an answer, as if she had already voiced them many times.**

"**That's your problem, not mine," the man said. "My job is to help this soul adapt herself to her new host without unnecessary pain or trauma. And you are here to interfare with my job."**

**Still slowly surfacing, acclimating myself to this new world of senses, I understood only now that I was the subject of the conversation. I was the soul they spoke of. It was a new connotation to the word, a word that had meant many other things to my host. On every planet we took a different name.****_Soul._****I suppose it was an apt description. The unseen force that guides the body.**

"**The answers to my questions matter as much as your responsibilities to the soul."**

"**That's debatable."**

**There was the sound of movement, and her voice was suddenly a whisper.**

"**When will she become responsive? The sedation must be about to wear off."**

"**When she's ready. Leave her be. She deserves to handle the situation however she finds most comfortable. Imagine the shock of her awakening – inside a rebel host injured to the point of death,**

Jared shuddered at that, not liking to hear that Mel had been so hurt again.

**in the escape attempt! No one should have to endure such trauma in times of peace!"**

**His voice rose with the increase of emotion.**

"**She is strong." The woman's tone was reassuring now. "See how well she did with the first memory, the worst memory. Whatever she expected, she handled this."**

"**Why should she have to?" the man muttered, but he didn't seem to expect an answer.**

**The woman answered anyway. "If we're to get the information we need –"**

"**_Need_****being your word. I would choose the term****_want_****."**

"**Then someone must take on the unpleasantness," she continued as if he had not interrupted. "And I think, from all I know of this one, she would accept the challenge if there is had been any way to ask her. What do you call her?"**

"They don't have names that follows them?" Doc wondered. He had always been a curious man, it was one of the many treats that led him into the profession of being a doctor, and his curiosity clearly took the better of him sometimes.

"I guess we'll see 'bout that one," Jeb mumbled, a very curious man as well.

**The man didn't speak for a long moment. The woman waited.**

"**Wanderer," he finally and unwillingly answered.**

"**Fitting," she said. "I don't have any official statistics, but she has to be one of the very few, if not the only one, who has wandered so far. Yes,****_Wanderer_****will suit her well until she chooses a new name for herself**."

"That must be why everyone was so excited about the planets she's been on. It doesn't seem to be normal to be on many. I wonder how many..." his voice trailed off, his mind going deeper into thoughts about this soul.

"Why do you think they choose to change planets?" Doc asked a second later, and Jeb pondered for a short moment.

"Boredom? Not liking it there well enough? Your guess is as good as mine."

**He said nothing.**

"**Of course, she may assume the host's name... We found no matches on record for the fingerprints or retail scan. I can't tell you what that name was."**

"She must have been a good hider," Ian mumbled, surprised that they didn't know her name, just like everyone else was. Jared or Jeb wasn't though. Jeb knew she was a Stryder after all, and Jared… Well he had taught her everything he'd known.

"**She won't take the human name," the man muttered.**

**Her response was conciliatory. "Everyone finds comfort their own way."**

"**This Wanderer will need more comfort than most, thanks to your style of Seeking."**

**There was sharp sounds – footsteps, staccato against a hard floor. When she spoke again, the woman's voice was across the room from the man.**

"**You would have reacted poorly to the early days of this occupation," she said.**

"**Perhaps you react poorly to peace."**

**The woman laughed, but the sound was false – there was no real amusement. My mind seemed well adapted to inferring the true meanings from tones and inflections.**

"**You do have a clear perception of what my Calling entails. Long hours hunched over files and maps. Mostly desk work. Not very often the conflict or violence you seem to think it is."**

"**Ten days ago you were armed with killing weapons, running this body down."**

**"That gives us a short time frame then, at least," Jared said more to himself than anyone else, but they all started to think about it. How long ago did this happen?**

**"How long did it take for you to find the caves?" Ian wanted to know, and Jared thought about it for a short moment. **

**"Almost a month."**

"**The exception, I assure you, not the rule. Do not forget, the weapons that disgust you are turned on our kind wherever we Seekers have not been vigilant enough. The humans kill us happily whenever they have the ability to do so.**

"And I would like to start with you," Jared muttered under his breath.

**Those whose lives have been touched by the hostility see us as heroes."**

Jared, Ian and Kyle all snorted at that, muttering 'heroes'.

"**You speak as if a war were raging."**

"**To the remains of the human race, one is."**

**These words were strong in my ears. My body reacted to them; I felt my breathing speed, heard the sound of my heard pumping louder then was usual. Beside the bed I lay on, a machine registered the increases with a muted beeping. The Healer and the Seeker were too involved in their disagreement to notice.**

"**But one that even they must realize is long lost. They are outnumbered by what? A million to one? I imagine you would know."**

"**We estimate the odds are quite a bit higher in our favor," she admitted grudgingly.**

**The Healer appeared to be content to let his side of the disagreement rest with that information. It was quiet for a moment.**

**I used the empty time to evaluate my situation. Much was obvious.**

**I was in a Healing facility, recovering from an unusually traumatic insertion.**

**I was sure the body that hosted me had been fully healed before it was given to me. A damaged host would have been disposed of.**

**Jared shuddered, not liking the thought of Mel being disposed of. Just like that. A few imperfections and she wasn't good enough. For the souls, everything had to be perfect, didn't it? Peace and free stuff and everyone being to kind to another. It was wrong. All of it. Just plain wrong. **

**I considered the conflicting options of the Healer and the Seeker.**

**According to the information I had been given before making the choice to come here, the Healer had the right of it. Hostilities with the few remaining pockets of humans were all but over. The planet called Earth was as peaceful and serene as it looked from space, invitingly green and blue, wreathed in its harmless white vapors. As was the way of the soul, harmony was universal now.**

**The verbal dissension between the Healer and the Seeker was out of character. Strangely aggressive for our kind. It made me wonder. Could they be true, the whispered rumors that had undulated like waves through the thoughts of the... of the...**

**I was distracted, trying to find the name of my last host species.**

**We'd had a name, I knew that. But no longer connected to that host, I could not remember the word. We'd used much simpler language than this, a silent language of thought that connected us all into one great mind. A necessary convenience when one was rooted forever into the wet black soil.**

**I could describe that species in my new human language. We lived in the floor of the great ocean that covered the entire surface of our world – a world that had a name, too, but that was also gone.**

"They live on the ocean floor... Is she talking about see weeds?" Doc mumbled, deep in thought about this new information about the souls and their worlds.

"It surely sounds like it," Ian was first to answer, but everyone else thought it.

**We each had a hundred arms and on each arm a thousand eyes, so that, without thoughts connected, not one sight in the vast waters went unseen. There was no need for sound, so there was no way to hear it. We tasted the waters, and, without sight, that told us all we needed to know. We tasted the suns, so many leagues above the water, and turned their taste into the food we needed.**

"That seems complicated," Jeb stated, and everyone heard that he wanted to know more. Clearly. And they all knew Jeb. He would find a way to get that information sooner or later.

**I could describe us, but I could not name us. I sighed for the lost knowledge, and then returned my ponderings to what I'd overheard.**

**Souls did not, as a rule, speak anything but the truth. Seekers, of course, had their requirements of their Calling, but between souls there was never reason for a lie.**

**"I wonder how that would be like. Never lying, never cheating, never doing anything like that, at all. It would ruin the surprise of life, wouldn't it?"**

**"_The surprise of life?"_ Ian asked his older brother, looking like him with a raised eyebrow.**

**"You know what I mean," he urged and Ian made a face because he did know what his brother meant. Sometimes more than enough. **

**With my last species' language of thought, it would have been impossible to lie, even had we wanted to. However, anchored as we were, we told ourselves stories to alleviate the boredom. Storytelling was the most honored of all titles, for it benefited everyone.**

**Sometimes, fact mixed with fiction so thoroughly that, though no lies were told, it was hard to remember what was strictly true. When we thought of the new planet – Earth, so dry, so varied and filled with such violent, destructive denizens we could barely imagine them – our horror was sometimes overshadowed by our excitement. Stories spun themselves quickly around the thrilling new subject. The wars – wars! our kind having to fight! – were first reported accurately and then embellished and fictionalized.**

**When the stories conflicted with the official information I sought out, I naturally believed the first rapports.**

**But there was whispers about this: of human hosts so strong that the souls were forced to abandon them. Hosts whose minds could not be completely suppressed. Souls who took on the personality of the body, rather than the other way around. Stories. Wild rumors. Madness.**

**"But it's not," Jared stated. "What will happen to her? Do you think Mel will ever actually take over? Or will the parasites destroy her first, just throw her away like garbage?"**

**"What would you rather happened?" Jeb asked, looking at the man beside him. **

**Honestly, Jared didn't know. So long he had faced her death. But now suddenly she wasn't dead. Sure, she wasn't alive either, but in a way she was there. And if there was a way she could take control, a way for him to hear her voice, her words, to talk to her again… He'd want that more than anything else in the world. But maybe it would have just been easier to still believe she was dead. Hope was a very dangerous thing. It could do crazy thing to you. **

**But that seemed almost to be the Healer's accusation...**

**I dismissed the thought. The more likely meaning of his censure was the distaste most of us felt for the Seeker's Calling. Who would choose a life of conflict and pursuit? Who would be attracted to the chore of tracking down unwilling hosts and capturing them?**

**Who would have the stomach to face the violence of this particular species, the hostile humans who killed so easy, so thoughtlessly? Here, on this planet, the Seeker's had become practically a... militia – my new brain supplied the term for the unfamiliar concept. Most believed that only the least civilized souls, the least evolved, the lesser among us, would be drawn to the path of Seeker.**

**Still, here on Earth the Seekers had gained new status. Never before had an occupation gone so awry. Never before had it turned into a fierce and bloody battle. Never before had the lives of so many souls been sacrificed.**

"I like the way she thinks of us, as dangerous and strong. She doubts the souls can do this... She's scared, just like she should be," Kyle said, and Doc looked at him.

"I don't think she doubts her own kind. But she does describe us as strong, you're right about that. I think she knows we are, but she knows the souls are strong, too. Just in two very, very different ways."

**The Seekers stood as a mighty shield, and the souls of this world were thrice-over indebted to them: for the safety they had faced willingly every day, and for the new bodies they continued to provide.**

**Now that the danger was virtually past, it appeared the gratitude was fading. And, for this Seeker at least, the change was not a pleasant one.**

**It was easy to imagine what her questions for me would be. Though the Healer was trying to bye me time to adjust to my new body, I knew I would do my best to help the Seeker. Good citizenship was quintessential to every soul.**

**So I took a deep breath to prepare myself. The monitor registered the movement. I knew I was stalling a bit. I hated to admit it, but I was afraid.**

"Of what?" Kyle wondered.

"Probably the memories," Doc answered him in a calm voice, before he read again.

**To get the information the Seeker needed, I would have to explore the violent memories that had made me scream in horror. More than that, I was afraid of the voice I'd heard so loudly in my head. But she was silent now, as was right. She was just a memory, too.**

At this Jared frowned, just like Ian. Jared didn't want to believe Mel was really gone, and Ian wondered if that was the case.

**I should not have been afraid. After all, I was called Wanderer now. And I'd earned that name.**

**With another deep breath, I delved into the memories that frightened me, faced them head-on with my teeth locked together.**

"She is brave, I must say," Doc murmured, and Kyle gave him a glare. He had been serious about what he had said earlier. He would give Doc a slap if he actually started to like this Wanderer.

But Doc ignored the glare.

**I could skip past the end – it didn't overwhelm me now. In fast forward, I ran through the dark again, wincing, trying not to feel. It was over quickly.**

**Once I was through that barrier, it wasn't hard to float through less-alarming things and places, skimming for the information I wanted.**

**I saw how she'd come to this cold city, driving by night in a stolen car chosen for its nondescript appearance. She'd walked through the streets of Chicago in darkness, shivering beneath her coat.**

**She was doing her own seeking. There was others like her here, or so she hoped. One in particular. A friend... no, family. Not a sister... a cousin.**

"Sharon," Jared and Doc mumbled at the same time.

**The words came slower and slower, and at first I did not understand why. Was this forgotten? Lost in the trauma of an almost death? Was I still sluggish from unconsciousness? I struggled to think clearly. This sensation was unfamiliar. Was my body still sedated? I felt alert enough, but my mind labored unsuccessfully for the answers I wanted.**

"Hmm," Doc mumbled, looking more thoughtful than ever.

"What?" Jared demanded, wanting to know every single thought that ran through Doc's head at the moment.

"It's just a theory... She's not sedated, I know so much from how she describe the way she feels. So the question is, is it Melanie that is doing this to her?"

There was silence for a while, before anyone spoke up.

"You think that's possible?" Ian asked, and Doc shook his shoulders.

"I don't know. But she did talk to her, and she seems to be able to show her memories if she wants to. Like with Jared's face..."

"Good question - and theory," Jeb said. "Maybe we should continue to read to find out?"

Answering Jeb's question, Doc begun to read again.

**I tried another avenue of searching, hoping for clearer responses.**

**What was her goal? She would find... Sharon – I fished out the name – and they would...**

**I hit a wall.**

"I guess that's our answer, right there," Jeb said, and Jared smiled without really wanted to. He didn't even really know why he smiled.

**It was blank, a nothing. I tried to circle around it, but I couldn't find the edges of the void. It was as if the information I sought had been erased.**

**As if the brain had been damaged.**

**Anger flashed through me, hot and wild.**

"Why is she angry?" Ian wondered, seeing no reason for anger.

"I'll bet it's Mel," Jared murmured back, the smile playing on his lips again.

**I gasped in surprise at the unexpected reaction. I'd heard of the emotional instability of these human bodies, but this was beyond my ability to anticipate. In eight full lives, I'd never had an emotion touch me with such force.**

"Eight lives, that's... much," Doc said, finally getting the answer to one of his many questions.

**I felt the blood pulse through my neck, pounding behind my ears.**

**My hands tightened into fists.**

**The machines beside me reported the acceleration of my heartbeats. There was an reaction in the room: the sharp tap of the Seeker's shoes approached me, mingled with a quieter shuffle that must have been the Healer.**

"**Welcome to Earth, Wanderer," the female voice said.**

"That's the end of the chapter," Doc said, and passed the book along to Kyle.


	4. Resisted

A/N: Time for a new chapter. Thank you for all of the reviews, you guys are just too awesome and I love you.

**- Resisted -**

**Resisted,** Kyle started and shot a quick glance at Jared.

"**She won't recognize the new name," the Healer murmured.**

**A new sensation distracted me. Something pleasant, a change in the air as the Seeker stood by my side. A scent, I realized. Something different than the sterile, odorless room.**

**Perfume, my new mind told me. Floral, lush...**

"**Can you hear me?" the Seeker asked, interrupting my analysis.**

"**Are you aware?"**

"**Take your time," the Healer urged in a softer voice than the one he had used before.**

**I did not open my eyes. I didn't want to be distracted. My mind gave me the words I needed, and the tone that would convey what I couldn't say without using many words.**

"Wanna bet she's going to say something... _rude_," Kyle said, almost laughing as he said the word rude. Everyone looked at him, glaring, but no one said anything.

"At least humor me," Kyle muttered under his breath before he continued to read.

"**Have I been placed in a damaged host in order to gain the information you need, Seeker?"**

"Maybe not _rude,_ but very direct," Doc stated to Wanderer's question.

**There was a gasp – surprise and outrage mingled – and something warm touched my skin, covered my hand.**

"**Of course not, Wanderer," the man said reassuringly. "Even a Seeker would stop at some things."**

**"Would they? Don't they want every little bit of information they can get?" Jared's tone was sour, his question directed at no one in particular. **

**The Seeker gasped again. Hissed, my memory corrected.**

"**Then why doesn't this mind function correctly?"**

"Because Mel's a strong one," Jeb mused, stroking his heard, clearly coming up with some sort of theory. Everyone else ignored him, knowing he would voice it sooner or later.

**There was a pause.**

"**The scans were perfect," the Seeker said. Her words not reassuring but argumentative.**

**Did she mean to quarrel with me?**

"**The body was entirely healed."**

"**From a suicide attempt that was perilously close to succeeding."**

At that Doc smiled a little, and Jared glared at him.

"Oh, I'm sorry Jared, but that's not why I'm smiling, you must see that."

"Then why are you?" Ian wanted to know, his voice calmer than Jared's would have been if he had been the one to speak.

"It's just... Kyle, don't hit me, I think that if I'm going ever to meet her, which I'm fairly certain I will, I'm going to like her. Very much," Doc answered, a small smile on his lips.

Kyle was about to say something, but Jeb stopped him with a glare, and he huffed before lowering his eyes to the book in his hands.

**My tone was stiff, still angry. I wasn't used to anger. It was hard to contain it.**

"**Everything was in perfect order –"**

**The Healer cut her off. "What is missing?" he asked. "Clearly, you've accessed speech."**

"**Memory. I was trying to find what the Seeker wants."**

**Though there was no sound, there was a change. The atmosphere, which had gone tense at my accusation, relaxed. I wondered how I knew this. I had a strange sensation that I was somehow receiving more than my five senses were giving me – almost a feeling that there was****_another_****sense, on the fringes, not quite harnessed. Intuition? That was almost the right word. As if any creature needed more than five senses.**

**The Seeker cleared her throat, but it was the Healer who answered.**

"**Ah," he said. "Don't make yourself anxious about some partial memory... difficulties. That's, well, not to be****_expected_****, exacly, but not surprising, considering."**

"**I don't understand your meaning."**

"She's not very smart. Of course it's because... the body nearly died," Kyle said, hesitant, not knowing what words to use.

"No, I don't think that's it..." Ian disagreed with his older brother.

"It is."

"I have a feeling it's not," Ian argued.

Kyle shot him a glare, and then smirked. "Wanna bet?"

Ian just rolled his eyes at this and Kyle laughed, certain he was right.

"**This host was part of the human resistance."**

"Because she nearly died, right Kyle?" Ian chuckled, looking at the man beside him.

"Well, it's not my fault you got the brain and I the looks," Kyle muttered, and Ian snorted without planning on giving another response. They had done this too many times.

The others didn't disapprove for once though. The brotherly bond helped ease some of the tension that was in the room, and right this moment they needed it. So if listening to the brothers helped them all feel a little better, they didn't mind. Not at the moment.

**There was a hint of excitement in the Seeker's voice now. "Those humans who were aware of us before insertion are more difficult to subdue. This one still resists."**

**There was a moment of silence while they waited for my response.**

**Resisting? The host was blocking my access? Again, the heat of my anger surprised me.**

"**Am I correctly bound?" I asked, my voice distorted because it came through my teeth.**

"**Yes," the Healer said. "All eight hundred twenty-seven points are latched securely in the optimum positions."**

**This mind used more of my faculties than any host before, leaving me only one hundred eighty-one spare attachments.**

"Wow, over one thousand attachments," Doc mumbled in awe. It was much more than he knew about. More than he could have ever imagined.

**Perhaps the numerous bindings were the reason the emotions were so vivid.**

"Or perhaps because they are to us too," Doc said, looking at Jared. His face was stale, his best poker face on at the moment.

**I decided to open my eyes. I felt the need to double-check the Healer's promises and make sure the rest of me worked.**

**Light. Bright, painful. I closed my eyes again. The last light I had seen had been filtered through a hundred ocean fathoms. But these eyes had seen brighter and could handle it. I opened them narrowly, keeping my eyelashes feathered over the breach.**

"**Would you like me to turn down the lights?"**

"**No, Healer. My eyes will adjust."**

"**Very good," he said, and I understood that his approval was meant for my casual use of the possessive.**

**Both waited quietly while my eyes slowly widened.**

**My mind recognized this as an average room in a medical facility. A hospital. The ceiling tiles were white with darker speckles. The lights were rectanglar and the same size as the tiles, replacing them at regular intervals. The walls were light green – a calming color,**

"I've always thought so, too," Doc said, deep in old memories of rooms just like the one Wanderer described. He missed those rooms. The safety of them, how he could be so deep in concentration in one of those room he would forget a world outside of it even existed. He hadn't felt something like that in a long time. And it used to be one of his favorite feelings.

**but also the color of sickness. A poor choice, in my quickly formed opinion.**

**The people facing me were more interesting than the room. The word****_doctor_****sounded in my mind as soon as my eyes fastened on the Healer. He wore loose-fitting blue green clothes that left his arms bare. Scrubs. He had hair on his face, a strange color that my memory called red.**

**Red! It had been three worlds since I had seen the color or any of its relatives. Even this gingery gold filled me with nostalgia.**

"Three worlds?" Ian pondered. "So, not every world has colors?"

"Or maybe simply not the ones we have here on Earth," Jeb answered in a second, thinking about it. This book made him more curious than he had ever been, and he had a feeling that wouldn't stop. He was starting to look forward to meeting this Wanderer. A soul. Inhabiting his niece. He knew it was wrong, but he couldn't help it. And technically Melanie was still there. At least a part of her. At least for the moment.

Jeb looked around the room, at the men sitting around him. He wasn't the only curious one. Doc, he had expected so much from him, and he knew Ian was a reasonable man. He was more worried about his brother though, and Jared… well, things were bound to be complicated.

Curiosity was good. But what would lead the other men, and in what direction?

**His face was generically human to me, but the knowledge in my memory applied the word****_kind._**

"Yes, that word seem to fit him," Doc said, and again Kyle glowered at him. But he wasn't alone this time, also Jared glared at him.

**An impatient breath pulled my attention to the Seeker.**

**She was very small. If she had remained still, it would have taken me longer to notice her there behind the Healer. She didn't draw the eye, a darkness in the bright room. She wore black from chin to wrists – a conservative suit with a silk turtleneck underneath.**

**Her hair was black, too. It grew to her chin and was pushed back behind her ears.**

**Her skin was darker than the Healer's. Olive toned.**

**The tiny changes in humans' expressions were so minimal they were very hard to read.**

**My memory could name the look on this woman's face, though. The black brows, slanted down over the slightly bulging eyes, created a familiar design. Not quite anger. Intensity. Irritation.**

"**How often does this happen?" I asked, looking at the Healer again.**

"**Not often," the Healer admitted. "We have so few full-grown hosts available anymore. The immature hosts are entirely pliable. But you indicated that you preferred to begin as an adult..."**

"**Yes."**

"**Most requests are the opposite. The human life span is much shorter than you're used to."**

"I wonder why she wanted to begin as an adult. Why start in the middle of a life?" Jeb talked to himself, pondering. "And why do they rarely offer up adults?"

"**I'm well versed in all the facts, Healer. Have you dealt with this... resistance before yourself?"**

"**Only once, myself."**

"**Tell me the facts of the case." I paused. "Please," I added, feeling a lack of courtesy in my command.**

**The Healer sighed.**

**The Seeker began tapping her fingers against her arm. A sign of impatience. She did not care to wait for what she wanted.**

"**This occured four years ago," the Healer began. "The soul involved had requested an adult male host. The first one to be avaliable was a human who had been living in a pocket of resistance since the early years of the occupation. The human... knew what would happen when he was caught."**

"**Just as my host did."**

"**Um, yes." He cleared his throat. "This was only the soul's second life. He came from Blind World."**

"**Blind World?" I asked, cocking my head to the side reflexively.**

"What, she's lived on eight planets and never heard if this one?" Kyle asked, skeptical, and Doc answered him. They seemed to be most involved in the conversations in this chapter.

"I think she knows what planet it is, just that we have another name on it. Just like the souls - Wanderer said the names were different from planet to planet."

"**Oh, sorry, you wouldn't know our nicknames. This was one of yours, was it not?" He pulled a device from his pocket, a computer, and scanned quickly. "Yes, your seventh planet. In the eighty-first sector."**

"**_Blind _****World?" I said again, my voice now disapproving.**

"**Yes, well, some who have lived there prefer to call it the Singing World."**

**I nodded slowly. I liked that better.**

"**And some who've never been there call it Planet of the Bats," the Seeker muttered.**

"I can see why she prefers Singing World over those two options," Ian mused, thinking about it. Those were three very different names for one planet. How could it differ so much? Were they blind bats who sung?

Shaking his head, he shook the thoughts away. He was too curious for his own taste, and he didn't really know how to feel about this. He knew both Jeb and the doctor wanted the soul here, to meet her – it - in person, but he wasn't so sure. He could see Kyle's side of things, maybe because he knew him so well, but he knew he would probably change his mind faster than his brother. The book was too thick not to be intriguing. They were reading this for a reason, he decided. He just wasn't sure what reason. To learn something, to change something? Both?

Suddenly he couldn't wait to meet his own book-self, because he was sure that time would come.

**I turned my eyes to her, feeling them narrow as my mind dredged up the appropriate image of the ugly flying rodent she referred to.**

"**I assume you are one who has never lived there, Seeker," the Healer said lightly. "We called this soul Racing Song at first – it was a loose translation of his name on... the Singing World. But he soon opted to take the name of his host, Kevin. Though he was slated for a Calling in Musical Performance, given his background, he said he felt more comfortable continuing in the host's previous line of work, which was mechanical.**

"**These signs were somewhat worrisome to his assigned Comforter, but they were well within normal bounds.**

"**Then Kevin started to complain that he was blacking out for periods of time. They brought him back to me, and we ran extensive tests to make sure there was no hidden flaw in the host's brain. During the testing, several Healers noted marked differences in his behaviors and personality. When we questioned him about this, he claimed to have no memory of certain statements and actions. We continued to observe him, along with his Comforter, and eventually discovered that the host was periodically taking control of Kevin's body."**

"His _own_ body," Jared said, hope in his voice and pain in his eyes.

"**Taking control?" My eyes strained wide. "With the soul unaware? The host took the body back?"**

"**Sadly, yes. Kevin was not strong enough to suppress this host."**

**Not strong enough.**

**Would they think me weak as well? ****_Was _****I weak, that I could not force this mind to answer my questions? Weaker still, because her living thoughts had existed in my head where there should be nothing but memory? I'd always thought of myself as strong.**

"And you probably are...-" Doc started, but Kyle interrupted him.

"Why are you talking to the book, to _Wanderer,-"_ he said the name with disgust, -"like it can hear you?"

Doc ignored his question.

"Only Melanie is strong, as well. Maybe there was a reason Wanderer was placed in her." He was going to continue but the look on Jared's face stopped him. Maybe this wasn't the right reason to be talking, or even thinking about this. Not with Jared so close, so emotional.

**The idea of weakness made me flinch. Made me feel shame.**

**The Healer continued. "Certain events occurred, and it was decided –"**

"**What events?"**

**The Healer looked down without answering.**

"**_What events?" _****I demanded again. "I believe I have a right to know."**

**The Healer sighed. "You do. Kevin... psychically attacked a Healer while not... himself."**

"Or very much_himself_," Jared growled. It was obvious that he would be... _emotional_ in this book. It was clear to everyone, and very clear to himself. He didn't like it. Didn't like being so exposed. He didn't like Mel being so exposed.

**He winced. "He knocked the Healer unconscious with a blow from his fist and then found a scalpel to cut the soul out of his body."**

**It took me a moment before I could speak. Even then, my voice was just a breath.**

"**What happened to them?"**

"**Luckily, the host was unable to stay conscious long enough to inflict real damage. Kevin was relocated, into an immature host this time. The troublesome host was in poor repair, and it was decided there wasn't much point in saving him.**

"**Kevin is seven human years old now and perfectly normal... aside from the fact that he kept the name Kevin, that is. His guardians are taking great care that he is heavily exposed to music, and that is coming along well..." The last was added as if it were good news – news that could somehow cancel out the rest.**

"**Why?" I cleared my throat so that my voice could gain some volume. "Why have these risks not been shared?"**

"**Actually," the Seeker broke in, "it is very clearly stated in all recruitment propaganda that assimilating the remaining adult human hosts is much more challenging than assimilating a child. An immature host is highly recommended."**

"**The word ****_challenging _****does not quite cover Kevin's story," I whispered.**

"She's right about that one," Kyle said, chocking everyone with his words. "What? I'm just saying," he defended himself when he saw the surprised faces around him.

They hadn't expected him to say something like that. It was such a small sentence, but so gentle. You'd almost think he'd have a change of mind.

"**Yes, well, you preferred to ignore the recommendation." She held up her hands in a peacemaking gesture when my body tensed, causing the stiff fabric on the narrow bed to crackle softly. "Not that I blame you. Childhood is extraordinary tedious. And you are clearly not****the average soul. I have every confidence that this is well within your abilities to handle. This is just another host. I'm sure you will have full access and control shortly."**

**By this point on my observations of the Seeker, I was surprised that she'd had the patience to wait for ant delay, even my personal acclimatization. I sensed her disappointment in my lack of information, and it brought back some of the unfamiliar feelings of anger.**

"**Did it not occur to you that you could get the answers you seek by being inserted into this body yourself?" I asked.**

**She stiffened. "I'm no skipper."**

**"She seems offended."**

"Maybe she offended her," Ian simply shrugged, not really sure why it would have offended the Seeker. He had his guesses, but he could never truly know.

**My eyebrows pulled up automatically.**

"**Another nickname," he Healer explained. "For those who do not complete a life term in their host."**

**I nodded in understanding. We'd had a name for it on my other worlds. On no world was it smiled upon. So I quit quizzing the Seeker and gave her what I could.**

"**Her name was Melanie Stryder. **

Jared made a face at this, clearly not liking what to come. Not any of it.

**She was born in Albuquerque, New Mexico. She was in Los Angles when the occupation became known to her, and she hid in the wilderness for a few years before finding... Hmmm. Sorry, I'll try that one again later. The body has seen twenty years. She drove to Chicago from..." I shook my head.**

"She's keeping a lot from her," Jared whispered, knowing the information that was kept hid himself and Jamie. It shouldn't surprise him, he knew Melanie would do anything for Jamie. But it did.

"**There was several stages, not all of them alone. The vehicle was stolen. She was searching for a cousin named Sharon, whom she had reason to hope was still human. She neither found nor contacted anyone before she was spotted. But..." I struggled, fighting against another blank wall. "I think... I can't be sure... I think she left a note... somewhere."**

Jared was very composed as Kyle read this, but truth was that the more Kyle read, the more information the Seeker got, the more he was waiting for his name to show up. Jamie's too.

"**So she expected someone would look for her?" the Seeker asked eagerly.**

"**Yes. She will be... missed.**

"More than missed," Jared murmured low under his breath.

"The note was for you and Jamie, wasn't it?" Ian wanted to know, and Jared nodded in a reply. Ian didn't want to ask for more, but he was sure that Jared had found the note.

**If she does not rendezvous with..." I gritted my teeth, truly fighting now.**

**The wall was black, and I could not tell how thick it was. I battered against it, sweat beading on my forehead. The Seeker and the Healer were very quiet, allowing me to concentrate.**

**I tried thinking of something else – the loud, unfamiliar noises the engine of the car had made, the jittery rush of adrenaline every time the lights of another vehicle drew near on the road. I already had this, and nothing fought me. I let the memory carry me along, let it skip over the cold hike through the city under the sheltering darkness of night, let it wind its way to the building where they'd found me.**

**Not me, ****_her ._****My body shuddered.**

Ian frowned at this, thinking about the way the soul said it was its body when it only wanted to, under more pleasant times.

"**Don't overextend –" the Healer began.**

**The Seeker shushed him.**

"Asshole," Kyle muttered so low under his breath no one could really hear it.

**I let my mid dwell on the horror of discovery, the burning hatred of the Seekers that overpowered almost everything else. The hatred was evil; it was pain. I could hardly bear to feel it. But I let it run its course, hoping it would distract the resistance, weaken the defenses.**

**I watched carefully as she tried to hide and then knew she could not. A note, scratched on a piece of debris with a broken pencil. Shoved hastily under a door. Not just any door.**

"**The pattern is the fifth door along the fifth hall on the fifth floor. Her communication is there."**

"Did you find it?" Jeb was the only one who dare ask the question out loud.

Jared nodded his head, a sad expression on his face. He didn't want to remember those words, but they would forever the scratched into his mind.

**The Seeker had a small phone in her hand; she murmured rapidly into it.**

"**The building was supposed to be safe," I continued. "They knew it was condemned. She doesn't know how she was discovered. Did they find Sharon?"**

"Why would it care?" Kyle asked, not waiting for an answer.

**A chill of horror raised goose bumps on my arms.**

**The question was not mine,**

"That's why," Kyle answered his own question and Ian managed to roll his eyes.

**but it flowed naturally through my lips as if it were. The Seeker did not notice any amiss.**

"**The cousin? No, they found no other human," she answered, and my body relaxed in response. "This host was spotted entering the building. Since the building was known to be condemned, the citizen who observed her was concerned. He called us, and we watched the building to see if we could catch more than one, and then moved in when that seemed unlikely. Can you find the rendezvous point?"**

**I tried.**

**So many memories, all of them so colorful and sharp. I saw a hundred places I'd never been, heard their names for the first time. A house in Los Angeles, lined in with tall fronded trees. A meadow in a forest, with a tent and a fire, outside Winslow, Arizona. A deserted rocky beach in Mexico. A cave, the entrance guarded by sheeting rain, somewhere in Oregon. Tents, huts, rude shelters. As time went on, the names grew less specific. She did not know where she was, nor did she care.**

**My name was now Wanderer, yet her memories fit in just as well as my own. Except that my wandering was by choice. These flashes of memory were always tinged with the fear of being haunted. Not wandering, but running.**

Almost everyone looked sad, knowing they had all did the same thing. It had always been the same hiding and running, and the fear of being discovered. For a very long time it had been like that. Until they found this place. It gave them a safety that they didn't think they would ever find again. And even though it wasn't much, it was more than what they needed. It gave them some hope.

**I tried not to feel pity. Instead, I worked to focus the memories. I didn't need to see where she'd been, only where she was going. I sorted through the pictures that tied with the word ****_Chicago_****,**

"That won't help you," Jared said.

**but none seemed to be anything more than random images. I widened my net.**

**What was outside Chicago? Cold, I thought. It was cold, and there was some worry about that.**

**Where? I pushed, and the wall came back.**

**I exhaled in a gust. "Outside the city – in the wilderness... a state park, away from any habitations.**

Jared stiffened at this, holding his breath, knowing the answer might come any second.

"They can't find you, or Jamie. Not now. Not here," Doc reassured him, but Jared didn't relax. He didn't like this, not a single bit of it. Sure, they were not there anymore. But none of them knew when this happened. They could have been only days away. A week, maybe two. He didn't know.

**It's not somewhere she'd ****been before, but she knew how to get there."**

"**How soon?" the Seeker asked.**

"**Soon." The answer came automatically. "How long have I've been here?"**

"**We let the host heal for nine days,**

Jared relaxed a little bit as Kyle read this, knowing it was too late for them to find them. Even their book selves.

**just to be absolutely sure she was recovered," the Healer told me. "Insertion was today, the tenth day."**

**Ten days. My body felt a staggering wave of relief.**

"Mel is definitely in there," Jeb and Jared said at the same time, Jared with both pain and hope in his voice.

"**Too late," I said. "For the rendezvous point... or even the note."**

**I could feel the host's reaction to this – could feel it much too strongly.**

**The host was almost...****_smug. _****I allowed the words she thought be spoken, so that I could learn from them. "He won't be there."**

Jared tensed a bit at that.

"**He?" The Seeker pounced on the pronoun. "Who?"**

**The black wall slammed down with more force than she'd used before. She was the tiniest fraction of a second too late.**

**Again, the face filled my mind. The beautiful face with the golden tan skin and the light-flecked eyes. The face that stirred a strange, deep pleasure within me while I viewed it so clearly in my mind.**

"She loves you," Ian stated, first to say something about it. Doc nodded slightly in Jared's direction, but Jared didn't answer. Just a small, sad smile playing on his lips. It was enough answer for all of them.

**Though the walled slapped into place with an accompanying sensation of vicious resentment, it was not fast enough.**

"**Jared," I answered. As quickly as if it had come from me, the thought that was not mine followed the name through my lips. "Jared is safe."**

Kyle didn't say anything; he simply gave the book to his brother.


	5. Dreamed

A/N: Sorry it took a while, but thank you for all of the amazing reviews, and well, here it finally is.

**- Dreamed -**

**Dreamed, **Ian read.

"I starts with a memory," he said then, only to make that clear to everyone.

**It is too dark to be so hot, or maybe too hot to be so dark. One of the two is out of place.**

**I crouch in the darkness behind the weak protection of a scrubby creosote bush, sweating out all the water left in my body. It's been fifteen minutes since the car left the garage. No lights have come on. The arcadia door is open two inches, letting the swap cooler do its job. I can imagine the feel of the moist, cool air blowing through the screen.**

**I wish it could reach me here.**

**My stomach gurgles, and I clench my abdominal muscles to stifle the sound.**

**It is quiet enough that the murmur carries.**

**I am so hungry.**

Jared frowned a little, looking as if he was deep in thought. Trying hard to figure out when this was. He knew it was before they met. She had never been this hungry after he came into the picture, neither had Jamie. He wouldn't let that happen. Never.

"Do you know what memory it is?" Doc asks, and Jared shook his head.

"No, it's before we met."

**There is another need that is stronger – another hungry stomach hidden safely far away in the darkness, waiting alone in the rough cave that is our temporary home. A cramped place, jagged with volcanic rock. What will he do if I don't come back?**

**All the pressure of motherhood with none of the knowledge or experience. I feel so hideously helpless. Jamie is hungry.**

**There are no other houses close to this one. I've been watching since the sun was still white hot in the sky, and I don't think there is a dog, either.**

"Why would she care if there was a dog there?" Kyle asked, and Ian rolled his eyes at him. His brother could be stupid something. He had a tendency to speak before thinking, and Kyle would figure it all out in just a second.

"Oh. Right."

**I ease up from my crouch, my calves screaming in protest, but keep hunched at the waist, trying to be smaller than the bush. The way up the wash is smooth sand, a pale pathway in the light of the stars. There are no sounds of cars on the road.**

**I know what they will realize when they return, the monsters who look like a nice couple in their early fifties. They will know exactly what I am, and the search will begin at once.**

**I need to be far away. I really hope they are going out for a night on the town.**

**I think it's Friday. They keep our habits so perfectly, it's hard to see any difference. Which is how they won in the first place.**

"She's smart," Jeb said.

"Which is one of the reasons she... _lived_ for as long as she did," Jared said, not really knowing what to say. How to express himself.

**The fence around the yard is only waist high. I get over easily, noiselessly.**

**The yard is gravel, though, and I have to walk carefully to keep my weight from shifting it. I make it to the patio slab.**

**The blinds are open. The starlight is enough to see that the rooms are empty of movement. This couples goes for an Spartan look, and I'm grateful. It makes it harder for someone to hide. Of course, that leaves no place for me to hide either, but if it comes to hiding for me, it's too late anyway.**

"Brave, too," Doc added to what Jeb had said previously.

**I ease the screen door open first, and then the glass door. Both glide silently.**

**I place my feet carefully on the tile, but this is just out of habit.**

**No one is waiting for me here.**

**The cool air feels like heaven.**

**The kitchen is to my left. I can see the gleam of granite counters.**

**I pull the canvas bag from my shoulder and start with the refrigerator.**

**There is a moment of anxiety as the light comes on when the door opens, but I find the button and hold it down with my toe. My eyes are blind. I don't have time to let them adjust. I go by feel.**

**Milk, cheese slices, leftovers in a plastic bowl. I hope it's the chicken-and-rice thing I watched him cooking for dinner. We'll eat this tonight.**

**Juice, a bag of apples. Baby carrots. These will stay good till morning.**

**I hurry to the pantry. I need things that will keep longer.**

**I can see better as I gather as much as I can carry. Mmm, chocolate chip cookies.**

Jared's face turned into a soft smile, knowing what to come. He had thought about this moment so many times lately, and it would be interesting to hear it from her point of view. To know exactly what she felt and thought.

**I'm dying to open the bag right now, but I grit my teeth and ignore the twist in my empty stomach.**

**The bag gets heavy too quickly. This will last us only a week, even if we're careful with it.**

**And I don't like being careful; I feel like gorging. I shove granola bars into my pockets.**

**One more thing. I hurry to the sink and refill my canteen. Then I put my head under the flow and gulp straight from the stream. The water makes odd noises when it hits my hollow stomach.**

**I start to feel panicked now when my job is done. I want to be out of here.**

**Civilazation is deadly.**

**I watch the floor on my way out, worried about tripping with my heavy bag, which is why I don't see the silhouetted black figure on the patio until my hand is on the door.**

Jared can't fight back his smile know, knowing for sure what will come. And soon.

But he grimaces at the same time, for the same reason.

"I have a feeling you might come in here," Ian said, looking at Jared who nodded.

"Yeah. And it's not really the _traditional _first meeting, the ones you see in movies," Jared answered, fighting back his chuckle.

**I hear his mumbled oath at the same time that a stupid squeak of fear escapes my****mouth. I spin to sprint for the front door, hoping the locks are not latched, or at least not difficult.**

**I don't even get two steps before rough, hard hands grab my shoulders and wrench me back against his body.**

"I have a feeling you don't really like her," Kyle chuckled, but Jared ignored him. But his smile was long gone, not liking what he does next.

**Too big, too strong to be a woman. The bass voice proves me right.**

"**One sound and you die," he threatens gruffly.**

"Nice move," Kyle laughs, and Ian shoved him hard. It was only Kyle who seemed to see the funny side of this. Both of them thought the other was a soul. Sure, it would be interesting to see how this ended, but at the moment this was serious.

**I am shocked to feel a thin, sharp edge pushing into the skin under my jaw.**

Jared looks down, ashamed.

"Might have been a better way to that," he mumbled and Kyle was about to laugh when Ian stabbed him in the side with his elbow.

**I don't understand. I shouldn't be given a choice. Who is this monster? I've never heard of one who would break rules. I answer the only way you can.**

"Which only proves she's more brave than most," Jared said, his ashamed look had changed into something that could only be called pride.

"**Do it," I spit through my teeth. "Just do it. I don't want to be a filthy parasite!"**

Jared looked sad again, and this time he wasn't alone. Even though Mel was brave, she was just that. A filthy parasite.

No one said anything.

**I wait for the knife, and my heard is aching. Each beat has a name. Jamie, Jamie, Jamie. What will happen to you know?**

"**Clever," the man mutters, and it doesn't sound like he's speaking to me.** "**Must be a Seeker. And that means a trap. How did they know?"**

"You haven't changed much, I have to say. Still thinks through everything," Jeb stated, looking over at Jared, who only slightly nodded. Yes, he had always been like that. Even long before the invasion.

**The steel disappears from my throat, only to be replaced by a hand as hard as iron.**

**I can barely breathe under his grip.**

"**Where are the rest of them?" he demands, squeezing.**

"**It's just me!" I rasp. I can't lead him to Jamie. What will Jamie do when I don't come back? Jamie is hungry!**

**I throw my elbow into his gut – and it really hurts.**

"I felt it, but it didn't hurt," Jared said, in a quiet voice. Like he was speaking to himself.

**His stomach muscles are as iron hard as the hand.****Which is very strange. Muscles like that are the product of hard living or obsession, and the parasites have neither.**

**He doesn't even suck in a breath at my blow. Desperate, I jab my heel into his instep.**

**This catches him off guard, and he wobbles. I wrench away but he grabs hold of my bag, yanking me back into his body. His hand clamps down on my throat again.**

"**Feisty for a peace-loving body snatcher, aren't you?"**

At this Kyle couldn't help but laugh, and Ian's elbow in his side only made him laugh more.

**His words are nonsensical. I thought the aliens were all the same. I guess they have their nut jobs, too, after all.**

Everyone actually chuckled at that one, seeing the funny side of the negative meaning. Kyle only continued with his booming laughter.

**I twist and claw, trying to break his hold. My nails catch his arm, but this just makes him tighten his hold on my throat.**

"**I ****_will _****kill you, you worthless body thief. I'm not bluffing."**

"And knowing Mel, she didn't think you were," Jeb said calmly.

"**Do it, then!"**

**Suddenly he gasps, and I wonder if any of my flailing limbs have made contact.**

Ian raised an eyebrow at Jared, wondering the same thing.

"No, I just realized she was human," Jared stated, and Ian's eyes returned to the book.

**I don't feel any new bruises.**

**He let's go of my arm and grabs my hair. This must be it. He's going to cut my throat.**

**I brace for the slice of the knife.**

**But the hand on my throat eases up, and then his fingers are fumbling on the back of my neck, rough and warm on my skin.**

"**Impossible," he breathes.**

**Something hits the floor with a thud. He's dropped the knife? I try to think of a way to get it. Maybe if I fall. The hand on my neck isn't tight enough to keep me from yanking free. I think I heard where the blade landed.**

**He spins me around suddenly. There is a click, and light blinds my left eye.**

**I gasp and automatically try to twist away from it. His hand tightens in my hair. The light flickers to my right eye.**

"**I can't believe it," he whispers. "You're still human."**

Jared was smiling again, knowing what his book-self was about to do.

**His hands grab my face from both sides, and before I can pull free, his lips come hard on mine.**

No one seemed to be able to hold their laugher back now.

"That was fast," Kyle said, looking at Jared.

"_'Not really the traditional first meeting'_, Jared? Who tries to kill someone, and then kiss them?" Ian said amused by Jared's sudden actions.

"Just read," Jared answered, laughing himself.

**I'm frozen for half a second. No one has ever kissed me in my life. Not a real kiss. ****Just my parent's pecks on the cheek or forehead, so many years ago. This is something I thought I would never feel. I'm not sure exactly what it feels like, though. There's too much panic, too much terror, too much adrenaline.**

**I jerk my knee up in a sharp thrust.**

"Ouch," Kyle and Ian said at the same time, looking like they felt the pain. And they could all but too well imagine it.

**He chokes out a wheezing sound, and I'm free. ****Instead of running for the front of the house again like he expects, I duck under his arm and leap through the open door.**

**I think I can outrun him, even with my load. I've got a head start, and he's still making pained noises.**

"She's fast, but not _that_ fast," Jared smiled, remembering times he had caught up to her. Playful times. Good times.

**I know where I'm going – I won't leave a path he can see in the dark. I never dropped the food, and that's good. I think the granola bars are a loss, though.**

"**Wait!" he yells.**

**_Shut up, _****I think, but I don't yell back.**

**He's running after me. I can hear his voice getting closer. "I'm not one of them!"**

**_Sure_****. I keep my eyes on the sand and sprint. My dad used to say I ran like a cheetah.**

"He's not the only one who did," Jeb smiled, thinking back.

"You never did say why you share your last name," Kyle said, looking at Jeb.

"I'm pretty sure you'll find out," was all he answered and Ian fought his laughter back. Sometimes his brother could just be too dumb for his own good.

**I was the fastest on my track team, state champion, back before the end of the world.**

"**Listen to me!" He's still yelling at full volume. "Look! I'll prove it. Just stop and look at me!"**

**_Not likely. _****I pivot off the wash and flit through the mesquites.**

"**I didn't think there was someone left! Please, I need to talk to you!"**

"Like that will get her to stop and listen," Kyle chuckled.

**His voice surprises me – it is too close.**

"**I'm sorry I kissed you! That was stupid! I've just been along so long!"**

"Nice excuse, man," Ian said, still amused by how Jared had handled this situation.

"Not the best way to put it, I know, but I was just babbling. Even if it _was_ the truth."

"**Shut ****_up!"_****I don't say it loudly, but I know he hears. He's getting even closer. I've never been outrun before. I push my legs harder.**

**There's a low grunt to his breathing as he speeds up, too.**

**Something big flies into my back, and I go down. I taste dirt in my mouth, and I'm pinned by something so heavy I can hardly breathe.**

"**Wait. A. Minute," he huffs.**

**He shifts his weight and rolls me over. He straddles my chest, trapping my arms under his legs. He is squishing my food.**

"A big man is sitting on her, holding her down, and she thinks about the food," Kyle scoffed and Jared rolled his eyes.

**I growl and try to squirm out from under him.**

"**Look, look, look!" he says. He pulls a small cylinder from his hip pocket and twists the top. A beam of light shoots out the end.**

**He turns the flashlight in his face.**

**The light makes his skin yellow. It shows prominent cheekbones beside a long thin nose and a sharply squared-off jaw. His lips are streched into a grin, but I can see that they are full, for a man. His eyebrows and lashes are bleached out from sun.**

**But that's not what he's showing me.**

**His eyes, clear liquid sienna in the illumination, shine with no more than human reflection. He bounces the light between left and right.**

"That's the best way of showing her that you're human," Doc said, like this actually happen right this second.

Jared didn't say anything, just waited for Ian to continue.

"**See? See? I'm just like you."**

"**Let me see your neck." Suspicion is thick in my voice. I don't let myself belive that this is more than a trick. I don't understand the point of the charade, but I'm sure there is one. There is no hope anymore.**

**His lips twists. "Well... That won't exactly help anything. Aren't the eyes enough? You know I'm not one of them."**

"**Why won't you show me your neck?"**

"**Because I have a scar there,"**

"Not the best thing to say," Ian said, and Jared shook his head.

"No, but it's still the truth."

**he admits.**

**I try to squirm out from under him again, and his hand pins my shoulder.**

"**It's self-inflicted," he explains. "I think I did a pretty good job, though it hurt like hell.****_I_****don't have all that pretty hair to cover****_my_****neck. The scars help me blend in."**

"**Get off me."**

**He hesitates, then gets to his feet in one easy move, not needing to use his hands. He holds one out, palm up, to me.**

"**Please don't run away. And, um, I'd rather you didn't kick me again, either."**

Ian, Kyle and Jared chuckled at this.

"Well then don't kiss her again," Kyle stated and Jared couldn't help but smile.

**I don't move. I know he can catch me if I try to run.**

"**Who are you?"**

**He smiles wide. "My name is Jared Howe. I haven't spoken to another human being in more than two years, so I'm sure I must seem... a little crazy**

"A _little_?" Kyle laughed and the others ignored him easily.

**to you. Please, forgive that and tell me your name, anyway."**

"**Melanie," I whisper.**

"**Melanie," he repeats. "I can't tell you how delighted I am to meet you."**

**I grip my bag tightly, keeping my eyes on him. He reaches his hand down toward me slowly.**

**And I take it.**

Jared small smile grew a little wider as Ian read this.

**It isn't until I see my hand curl voluntarily around his that I realize I believe him.**

**He help me to my feet and doesn't release my hand when I'm up.**

"**What now?" I ask guardedly.**

"**Well, we can't stay here for long. Will you come back with me to the house? I left my bag. You beat me to the fridge."**

"What are the odds," Doc pondered. "Two humans, raiding the same house on the same night. It's almost,"

"Like it was meant to be," Ian continued, looking at Jared. They met for a reason. That night happened for a reason. Jamie and Jared came here for a reason. Hell, Jeb even found this place for a reason. They all did. Maybe the same reason they were now reading this book? Was this some kind of piece in a big plan. Who's plan? God's? _No, there's no such thing as a God,_ Ian thought to himself. _So stop over thinking this._

**I shake my head.**

**He seems to realize how brittle I am, how close to breaking.**

"**Will you wait for me here, then?**" **he asks in a gentle voice. "I'll be very quick. Let me get us some more food."**

"**Us?"**

"**Do you really think I'm going to let you disappear? I'll follow you even if you tell me not to."**

**I don't want to disappear from him.**

Now it wasn't just Jared who smiled at Ian's words. Even Kyle smiled a little.

"**I..." How can I not trust another human completely? We're family – both part of the brotherhood of extinction. "I don't have time. I have so far to go and... Jamie is hungry."**

"**You're not alone," he realizes. His expression shows uncertainty for the first time.**

"What exactly did you think there?"

"I don't really remember. Disbelief that she wasn't alone, that she had someone with her. I didn't know who he was, how they knew each other."

"What you're saying is, you were jealous," Kyle stated and Jared shook his head in amusement. Yes, maybe he had been a little jealous. But not for that reason. But for the reason that he had spent so much time alone, and she hadn't. It was wrong of him, but he couldn't help it.

"**My brother. He's just nine, and he's so frightened when I'm away. It will take me half the night to get back to him. He won't know if I've been caught. He's so****_hungry."_****As if to make my point, my stomach growls loudly.**

**Jared's smile is back, brighter than before. "Will it help if I give you a ride?"**

"**A ride?" I echo.**

"**I'll make you a deal. You wait here while I gather more food, and I'll take you anywhere you want to go in my Jeep. It's faster than running – even faster than ****_you_**** running."**

"**You have a car?"**

"**Of course. Do you think I walked out here?"**

**I think of the six hours it took me to walk here, and my forehead furrows.**

"**We'll be back to your brother in no time," he promises. "Don't move from this spot, okay?"**

**I nod.**

"**And eat something, please. I don't want your stomach to give us away."**

**He grins, and his eyes crinkle up, fanning lines out of the corners. My heart gives one hard thump, and I know I will wait here if it takes him all night.**

**He is still holding my hand. He let's go slowly, his eyes not leaving mine.**

**He takes a step backward, then pauses.**

"**Please don't kick me," he pleads, leaning forward and grabbing my chin.**

"You're going to kiss her again," Ian stated, and Kyle seemed to be holding his laughter back.

"Of course," Jared said, in a matter-of-fact voice.

"Please, _please,_ tell me she kicked you again," Kyle chuckled, and Jared did too, even though his eyes were vary. Again, he knew what to come.

**He kisses me again, and this time I feel it. His lips are softer than his hands, and hot, even in the warm desert night. A flock of butterflies riots in my stomach and steals my breath. My hands reach up for him instinctively. I touch the warm skin of his cheek, the rough hair on his neck. My fingers skim over a line of puckered skin, a raised ridge right beneath the hairline. I scream.**

"At least she didn't kick you," Ian said, a small smile on his lips.

"At least there's that," Jared answered him, the sad smile playing in the corner of his mouth again.

"The memory ended there," Ian continued then, taking a short pause before the words coming out of his mouth was not his own.

**I woke up covered in sweat. Even before I was all the way awake, my fingers were on the back of my neck, tracing the short line left from the insertion. I could barely detect the faint pink blemish with my fingertips. The medicines the Healer had used had done their job.**

**Jared's poorly healed scar had never been much of a disguise.**

"I guess I knew that one," Jared mumbled.

"I can try to fix it, make it better," Doc suggested but Jared shook his head.

"No, we don't have the right medications for that."

Doc looked down, sadness visible on his face. "You're right. But I wish you weren't."

**I flicked on the light beside my bed, waiting for my breathing to slow, veins full of adrenaline from the realistic dream.**

**A new dream, but in essence so much the same as the many others that had plagued me the past months.**

**No, not a dream. Surely a memory.**

**I could still feel the heat of Jared's lips on mine. My hands reached out without my permission, searching across the rumpled sheet, looking for something they did not find.**

**My heart ached when they gave up, falling to the bed limp and empty.**

**I blinked away the unwelcomed moisture in my eyes. I didn't know how much more of this I could stand. How did anyone survive this world, with these bodies whose memories wouldn't stay in the past where they should? With these emotions that were so strong I couldn't tell what****_I_****felt anymore?**

**I was going to be exhausted tomorrow, but I felt so far from sleep that I knew it would be hours before I could relax. I might as well do my duty and get it over with.**

"I don't like the sound of that," Jared said.

**Maybe it would help me take my mind off things I'd rather not think about.**

**I rolled off the bed and stumbled to the computer on the otherwise empty desk. It took a few seconds for the screen to glow to life, and another few seconds to open my mail program. It wasn't hard to find the Seeker's address;**

"I _really_ don't like the sound of that."

"Jared, you know they won't be able to find us here," Doc reassured him, but it didn't help.

**I only had four contacts: the Seeker, the Healer, my new employer, and his wife, my Comforter.**

"**There was another human with my host, Melanie Stryder."**

**I typed, not bothering with a greeting.**

"**His name is Jamie Stryder; he is her brother."**

**For a panicked moment, I wondered at her control. All this time, and I'd never even guessed at the boy's existence – not because he didn't matter to her, but because she protected him more fiercely than other secrets I'd unraveled.**

"Then why show him to her now?" Ian wondered.

"She didn't – not on propose. She could never... hurt him in any way."

"Then what made her weaker?"

"I don't know, Ian. I have no idea."

**Did she have more secrets this big, this important? So sacred that she kept them even from my dreams? Was she that strong? My fingers trembled as I keyed the rest of the information.**

"**I think he's a young adolescent now. Perhaps thirteen. They were living in a temporary camp, and I believe it was north of the town of Crave Creek, Arizona. That was several years ago, though. Still, you could compare a map to the lines I remembered before. As always, I'll tell you if I get anything more."**

"The lines? What lines?" Kyle asked, and he didn't miss the glance Jared and Jeb shared.

"Many years ago, I gave Melanie some lines that would lead her here. Not directly _here_, of course. But so that I would know where to find her, if she followed them."

"That's how Jamie and I got here," Jared added.

**I sent it off. As soon as it was gone, terror washed through me.**

**_Not Jamie!_**

**Her voice in my head was as clear as my own spoken aloud. ****I shuddered in horror.**

**Even as I struggled with the fear of what was happening, I was gripped with the insane desire to e-mail the Seeker again and apologize for sending her my crazy dreams. To tell her I was half asleep and to pay her no attention to the silly message I'd sent.**

**The desire was not my own.**

**I shut off the computer.**

**_I hate you, _****the voice snarled in my head.**

"**Then maybe you should leave," I snapped. The sound of my voice, answering her aloud, made me shudder again.**

**She hadn't spoken to me since the first moments I'd been here. There was no doubt that she was getting stronger. Just like the dreams.**

**And there was no question about it; I was going to have to visit my Comforter tomorrow. Tears of disappointment and humiliation welled in my eyes at the thought.**

**I went back to bed, put a pillow over my face, and tried to think of nothing at all.**

"That's the end of the chapter," Ian said, and passed the book to Jeb.


End file.
